Excuses, Excuses…

17 Apr

I’m pregnant so I can’t drink. This poses a problem for me because the minute I say “I’m not drinking” everyone will immediately assume I’m pregnant. I got married last year, most of my friends know we were going to try at some point this year and I never turn down a glass of wine. It’s a no brainer to the female of the species.

What am I going to do? I don’t want to tell people until I’m at the 12 week mark. Of course the risk of miscarriage is highest during the first 3 months and I can’t think of anything more horrible than having to untell people. Plus, I’m enjoying my little secret.

I love touching my belly and no one knowing that there is a baby in there. I love having a little chat to my bub and telling him/her how much love I already feel. More than anything, I love it when hubby kisses my belly and the 3 of us share our perfect secret – a secret I want to keep just that little bit longer.

So I’m going to lie and even though I find doing so really stressful, I have no choice. I am going to become the master of excuses, the queen of non-drinking-explanation, and the leader of soft-drink- justification. However, what I didn’t factor into this was how most of what my husband, our friends and I do is socialise with alcohol. I’m starting to think we need an intervention.

Very early on I met a friend who I used to work with. Where? A cocktail bar. It was like torture. I’d only known for a week and a half so I was still in the ‘how am I going to cope without alcohol for the next 9 months phase’ (it’s still a bit there in case you’re wondering).  So I started my plan early. The day before I emailed her saying that I’m more than happy to meet, but that I have a large abscess under my tooth and am on strong antibiotics so can’t drink. Luckily I have had this before so was able to answer questions without feeling like an utter fraud.  As she sipped away on her fabulous cocktail I had to contend with a virgin one. They told me they could make me one that tasted like “rum and coke”. It didn’t. It tasted like medicine.

To make matters worse they then bought out some bar snacks “courtesy of the chef”. Yes! Free food almost makes up for the lack of wine coursing through my blood. My eyes light up as I see waitress carrying it over to our table. “ooh yummy” says friend “I’m starving”. “So am I” I say, until I see said food. It’s prawns. Big fat juicy delicious prawns with sweet chilli dipping sauce. Which obviously I can’t eat. “Oh I’m not keen on prawns” I say, “you can have mine”. Is this play jokes on the pregnant lady day?

And so the fibs continue. I use the antibiotics line on another friend who buys it, phew! Do the same at hubby’s boss and wife’s house dinner party, although she’s a mum so not sure how much she believed me. Saying that, it’s easier with mum’s, they understand the need to keep it quiet so don’t question you even if they do suspect.

What I know for sure is that if any of my friends tell me they’re on antibiotics, I’ll smile sweetly and wish them better (then go home and discuss with hubby whether I think they’re pregnant or not). What I also know is that I can’t be on antibiotics for the next six weeks. I need some more excuses.


2 Responses to “Excuses, Excuses…”

  1. Recipe Junkie April 17, 2012 at 2:09 pm #

    Ha! I enjoyed reading this – reminded me of when I was pregnant for the first time. Fortunately, I felt completlely nauseated everytime I smelled red wine or cigarette smoke (or lavender handwash or Persil washing powder) so while it was actually pretty easy to give up the fags and booze (and the washing, it seems) I had the same problem about what to tell people – no one I knew would have believed that I was giving up for any other reason (even antibiotics…). In the end I just didn’t go out with anyone I didn’t want to tell, and told the people who I knew would be excited but then supportive if things went wrong. Good luck!

  2. mum-to-be April 17, 2012 at 3:02 pm #

    Thanks Recipe Junkie! the antibiotic trick only worked with very few people. Others I’ve had to be much more inventive (blog post to follow about that!)

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